Lesson 139. The Purpose of Friendship

I simply love, and this is a simple, natural state of mind and way of thinking for me.

No one will ever be able to see with their eyes and understand with their mind what I am writing about. It can only be felt with the heart when one soul comes into direct contact with another. From the outside, however, everything looks ordinary, without appearance or grandeur.

But God knows what He is endowing me with and watches very carefully how I spend the heavenly treasure and how much of it I invest in one undertaking or another. He greatly desires to be magnified in my life, and I understand this and ask for wisdom as to how best to do it.

God’s dream for me is that He desires to reveal His love to me and to see in me His reflection, His character.

Will I bring joy to my Creator? I desire this very much.

Do you know what the greatest longing of one who loves is? It is the absence of an open heart in a person close to you—a heart that you can enter and fill with all the heavenly blessings of love, happiness, and friendship. It is so sad when you remain alone with all these heavenly treasures, needed by no one, wanted by no one, lonely among friends, brothers, and sisters.

But Jesus comforts you, reminding you that He too experienced all this and understands your struggle and your joys.

Sometimes you so greatly desire someone to be near who will receive your love and friendship with joy and great eagerness, thirst for it, inspire you to greater love, thank God for you, and repay you in kind. Although love seeketh not her own, it deeply values people like this and greatly longs to have them, so that it may give itself and give from a pure heart. There is good news: in eternity everyone will be like this, but we must learn it here.

It is so wonderful when you love a friend, observe him, sense his spirit, read his thoughts, see the expression on his face and the emotions that arise through your influence; when you immerse yourself completely in friendship and open your heart in order to give it to the person close to you; and when you watch how you are received, how your love is valued and accepted, and how the soul of that dear person opens to let you in and never let you go. You see this and are in no hurry to leave, nor do you intend to—why would you? Sincerity, kindness, tenderness, peace, and indescribable joy overflow the heart, although you are simply talking about ordinary things, while soul unites with soul and heart with heart. The Spirit of God reveals to you the most beautiful things that can be found in your friend, and you heed these revelations and quietly rejoice in the beautiful moments of loving fellowship.

If you have such a friend, value him, cherish him, and love him with all your heart, and he will always bring you joy by his presence, a kind word, or a helpful deed, even if he is very far away.

For love there are no boundaries, no time, no nationality, sex, or age. It seeks opportunities to give itself, to give itself for ever, so that next time it may give even more. It remembers very well every place and heart where it was received and loves returning there to give itself again and make that place even more beautiful.

Will you say that nothing like this exists in the world? You are mistaken. It does. Take little children, for example: their sincere embraces, simple and pure words, absolute trust, and acceptance of you as their friend.

This can also be found among adults, though less often. Everyone has already been hurt once and does not want pain, yet your sincere love opens the soul.

I have described the desires of love in human terms, and perhaps each of you can relate to the dream of being needed by someone, or even by a particular person with whom you live in the same home. But reality is not so romantic, and one can only dream. Sometimes people are ready to destroy you simply because you are kind to others.

Now imagine how the One Who is Love dreams about each of us. What is His dream for every person, and with what attention does He watch every process in my heart—my response and my behaviour? How He longs to give Himself to me! My acceptance of His love inspires Him so greatly that He is even ready to seat me beside Himself upon the throne, so that we will never be separated again.

Jesus loves you, my friend. These true words contain the best truth about you. And Christ’s greatest dream is to be needed by you, to be received by you, and to be valued by your whole being.

The loneliest place for love is a circle of those close to you who do not need you. Sometimes they need your strength, your money, your knowledge, your experience, or your help, but you yourself, as a loving friend, are not wanted.

Perhaps for Christ the loneliest place on earth is also the Church, where people come to sing songs about Him, preach a sermon, and ask Him for something, yet keep Jesus Himself at a distance behind the closed door of their heart and make it clear by all their behaviour that they do not need Him.

But love does not grow cold. It seeks an outlet. And who will receive it?

If you have a friend who joyfully receives you and makes it unmistakably clear that you are dear to him, needed by him, and welcome at any time, then rejoice that you have such a friend.

When you receive into your heart a person who loves you, you accomplish two very important things. You inspire him to greater love and greater change, to greater discoveries and greater joy; you make him needed by you. The second point is that you yourself become loving toward others. Irreversible processes take place in your mind; you begin to discover the laws of love, which are as eternal as God, and together with the person who loves you, you welcome into your life the One Who is Love. For he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God. It is such a beautiful state when we love one another, and everyone who abides in it benefits. There is no sin in love; it is pure and perfect. It is the foundation of holiness and true wisdom. Whoever obtains it, tastes its true essence and depth, and learns the laws of its being obtains an eternal and true treasure for the soul and is destined for eternal happiness, peace, and joy in the Lord.

And I have decided to love and am ready to follow this path until the final victory. Sometimes it takes years to win someone’s heart, while at other times someone surrenders without a fight.

It is so interesting to experience this constant tension, because you think only about whom you might love, how you might bring joy to someone’s heart, and whom you might help. Love gives you commands that you carry out, opens new prospects to you, and teaches you many good things. And it never ends. Love has a divine nature, yet it is considered human, because it acts among us, and without reflecting on its nature, we regard it as our own—our possession and creation. Love, however, comes from Heaven to bless what is earthly. It comes to remain for ever and give us a portion of eternity.

And in order to carry out this plan more effectively, love takes its own sister, Friendship, as an ally. Together they seek a person whom they can teach, so that through that person they may pour themselves out into this world, bringing love, friendship, and happiness. And this purpose will be achieved.

1. What ‘pearl’ did you find in this lesson?

2. What does our Lord dream about?

3. Have you welcomed Jesus into your heart? If not, what is preventing you?

4. What happens when we welcome a friend into our life?

5. What does the Lord expect from us?

6. What is the purpose of agape friendship?

7. Please read James 1:25, 16–17; 2:12; 2 Peter 1:3–8; 1 Peter 1:22; 1 John 4:16, 21; 3:16; Ephesians 3:9–10; 4:13, 15; John 17:21–23; Zephaniah 2:3; and Hebrews 13:1 in the light of this lesson.