Lesson 208. The Dark Night of the Soul

Something dark that a person has never experienced before happens in the life of everyone, and by nature we try in every possible way to avoid this event or drown it out with something good. But those who believe in Christ move confidently toward this event and will not be able to bypass it. Sooner or later, everyone who comes to know God and grows in Him approaches this condition. It is something like a dark forest through which I will have to pass. And the more light is poured into my life, the more likely it is that such trials of my faith will soon begin and knock me out of the rut of my usual experiences.

Perhaps what I call it can be called something else, but let us give it a provisional name—the dark night of the soul. I myself passed through this time and did not understand what was happening to me. I felt very melancholy and lonely, and I could only hold on to Christ by faith, rely on His assurances of love and faithfulness, and thus continue onward. I also know many brothers and sisters who have experienced something similar. And no one avoided it.

But this trial also has one particular feature. When this event enters my life, I can pass through it, or I can turn back and remain where everything is familiar and known, where it is light and everything is clear. The soul does not want to go into the fire; with every fiber of its being, it resists all trials.

But at the very least, I need to know that such a trial takes place. If I know this and ask God to be with me and lead me through it, then when it comes, it will be easier for me to endure everything. Oh, how I wish someone had told me about this earlier. Forewarned is forearmed. And in our school, we learn many good things before they draw near. And they will come. Although everyone’s trials and experiences are different, and our perceptions differ, the path that all of us must travel is one, and it is very narrow. We have One Teacher, the curriculum is the same for everyone, and one textbook has been given to all of us for all ages.

When a tree is small, it is very easy to shape it and direct its growth. Unnecessary branches can be pruned, young twigs can be bent in the right direction, and excess shoots and fruit can be removed so that they do not deprive the tree of its vital strength. But when the tree has grown, it has already been formed, and what is unnecessary must simply be chopped down or sawed off.

God leads His children as a people, but at the same time He conducts individual lessons with each one, giving and revealing the distinctive qualities and gifts inherent in that person. And with the student’s consent, the Lord develops these talents for service to other people and for His glory.

Not everything is within my reach, and I cannot become everything. But if I wish to master a particular field of knowledge and begin devoting time and mental effort to it, I will certainly learn something and discover something new for myself.

The dark night of the soul is the unusual condition into which I enter in the process of my spiritual growth. It may come for no apparent reason, or the Lord may create a crisis in my life: an illness, an injury, a fall, or something else may happen to me. But I begin to understand that darkness has entered my life. Spiritually, I feel very bad. I do not want to do anything; all earthly undertakings lose their meaning, but I continue doing them because I am accustomed to living this way, or simply because they must be done and there is no one to replace me. Fears, doubts, and disappointments come. I begin to reevaluate my entire life and everything I possess, weighing it and casting many things aside. It is difficult to describe exactly what is happening, but it is something like apathy and melancholy. And my friends, who do not understand what is happening to me, begin to comfort me in their own way, but it does not help.

It is possible to leave this condition by knowing many ways to occupy myself with something useful and familiar. And I can go back, as many people do. Or I can move forward, trusting in the Lord and relying on His wisdom and His promises that He will always be with me.

It is like a revolution of the soul, when I can no longer live in the old way but do not know how to live in the new way. My previous experience and knowledge have reached maturity and no longer delight me as they did at first, but have become familiar. I long to grow and to know the spiritual world. I long to enter the world of the Bible and immerse myself completely in new revelations.

And it is the Lord Who brings me to this time. The fire of trials is something I cannot avoid in my earthly life with God. It is the fire that brings spiritual pain and distress but does not kill. And if in earlier times God allowed something to happen without hastening events, now the events indicate that I should hurry, or I may be too late and miss something very important.

Why is the dark night of the soul necessary? I am made in such a way that when everything around me is rosy and sunny, I consider this the height of bliss, make myself comfortable in these circumstances, and do not plan for difficult trials. If water is told that it must flow uphill, it will not make such a decision; it will search for low places to fill. In order for it to rise uphill, it needs outside help and special equipment, because water has no power to accomplish this by itself. Therefore, my growth is not an innate property of mine, but a process directed by God, Who places the laws of this growth within me and sustains them when I begin to obey them.

As I experience the night of the soul, I allow my soul to pass through a process of purification and a rethinking of many things. Melancholy, anxiety, fears, and other things torment my soul, and I begin to understand that I desperately need the God in Whom I already believe. But now I need Him as the One to Whom I can cling and hold fast. Going back will bring me no prospect; I will habitually do what I know and know how to do, while the future lies in darkness. I do not know what awaits me ahead, but it is precisely there that the Lord draws me, and He does not forsake me. I sense Him; I believe that He is near. He is faithful to His promises, and they strengthen me, and I believe that I will not be left alone. Our relationship with Jesus becomes very personal, very close. For He alone understands me and truly supports me. And He gives me confidence that there will be light ahead—bright light. There is something great and inaccessible there that I do not yet know.

I cry out day and night, and I believe that He hears me. My soul passes through the land of darkness.

The enemy of the soul tries to offer me his own solution to these experiences. He has doctors, pills, alcohol, entertainment, travel, the world of laughter and foolishness, every kind of show; or he simply speaks to me through those close to me: “Curse God, and die.” But this world does not interest me. God has laid a foundation in my heart, and I will build my house with God; I cannot do otherwise.

I remember the heroes of the Bible. They all experienced something similar, and their experience of victory strengthens me.

Time passes, and I am still alive. Ahead I see light—beautiful light, new and amazing. I enter a new class and understand that something new that I did not know is opening before me. I begin to seek depth. I seek it in truth and in relationships, and I find it. I have begun to look at the world more seriously and have sifted much that was unnecessary out of my soul. The purity of the revelations draws me, and it is so interesting. Suddenly, in my heart, I realize how greatly I lack love, and I ask for it. And I see the light, move toward it, and discover a new world.

1. Please read 2 Corinthians 1:8–10; 2:4; Philippians 3:12–14; Deuteronomy 4:30–31; Psalm 22:11; 25:16–18; 34:19; 39:2–3; 50:15; Ecclesiastes 1:18; Matthew 24:21–22; John 16:33; Romans 5:3–5; 1 Peter 1:6–9; and Revelation 7:14 in the light of our lesson.

2. Did anything new open up to you in this lesson?

3. Do you understand the expression “the dark night of the soul”? Or do you have another definition for this condition?

4. Have you experienced something similar? If so, how did you come out of it, and where did it lead you?

5. Is it possible to avoid such trials?

6. Why is God not opposed to our having tribulation in the world and in our spiritual growth?

7. What should I do if I have not yet experienced anything like what is described in the lesson? Should I prepare for it?

8. Can I create a time of tribulation for myself through my own sins?

9. Are mature Christians ever happy? Or is tribulation the lot of every believer?