The Main Thing Should Be Main

What is more important: to create a family or to preserve it? Without the first there cannot be the second, and without the second there is no point in the first.

It is important to understand what a family is before creating it. And if a family already exists, then it is necessary to understand what it was created for.

Whatever happens in my life, I remain in Heaven's eyes that very person for whose salvation the Heavenly Father gave His beloved Son, so that I would not perish but have Eternal life.

My faith in God and my personal knowledge of the Father and Son are the most important enterprise in my life. These relationships lay the most solid foundation for all subsequent structures, and I carry this union in my heart and take it with me into any sphere of my life and being.

Before I create an earthly family, I need to become a member of the Heavenly family. If I already have a family that was created before my acquaintance with Christ, then upon the conclusion of my union with the Lord it automatically passes with me under God's care and becomes God's property.

God attracts me to Jesus in any status, and He is ready to make of me, whoever I am, what He wants to see. Without God in the heart it is impossible to build something right and lasting. If in my life there is no foundation, which should be Christ, then everything I decide to create, preserve or build will turn out to be a house on sand. The appearance of such a construction will not differ from solid structures, but any test of faith will destroy everything that does not have a reliable foundation.

A family is a union for life. And even if it was created incorrectly in violation of all God's laws, the Lord can restore this enterprise on Himself and establish it in truth and love, if at least one of the two people decides to dedicate their life to God.

When I was a child, every summer my parents took me on vacation to my grandmother in the village. She lived in a small house with one room. This house had no foundation, and the wooden walls stood on simple stones, which threatened to flood the small earthen cellar under the floor where potatoes were stored in case of heavy rains. But my father hired people who, having raised the walls of the house with a jack, poured a solid foundation under it and connected the walls to the foundation. The appearance of the structure did not change, but everyone felt more at ease living in this house from the awareness that it now stood firmly and was protected from rotting and accidental destruction.

The Lord knows how to strengthen everything shaky and flimsy. And even if you entrust Him with a smoking flax, He will not extinguish it, and a bruised reed He will not break.

My friend bought himself a house with a barn, and asks me what is better—tear down the old barn and build a new one in its place or repair the old one. I say that the repair will cost more than a new structure, but they may not give permission to erect the same barn because its dimensions exceed the permissible standards.

A family is not a barn that can be demolished and something better created in its place. A family is a union for life, until death do us part. Creating a wife for Adam, the Lord united these people for all Eternity. God's plans did not include building something temporary that could later be replaced with something better. Family is forever.

But man sinned, and in our days the status of the family has been reduced to the level of an old-fashioned tradition that can be avoided, living in temporary shelters or building houses, changing them like gloves. And at the same time everyone dreams of happiness, which simply cannot be where sin reigns. Happiness begins in my mind, and my mind must have a solid foundation, which can only be given by faith in God, knowledge of His laws and obedience to these truths.

If I decide to create a happy family, but at the same time want to create another extramarital union to make someone else happy, what kind of happiness will I build? The lust of the flesh, although it brings temporary pleasure, has nothing to do with true happiness. No matter how beautiful the lawn behind my fence, it also needs to be mowed.

No matter how dilapidated my family may be, God knows how to restore ruins. His love lays a solid foundation in any relationship and heals any wounds. But think for yourself, if you don't have a family yet, what is better: to build something solid, beautiful and wonderful to enjoy it all your life, or to grab the first thing that comes along, knowing that if necessary it can be repaired or replaced with another? The conclusion is obvious, but reality is sometimes not so.

You can build on Christ and then let another spirit into your life. Nothing good will come of that either. But still, knowing Christ, I have much greater chances that if I rush or make a mistake in something, He will be able to correct it and turn it to good.

My relationship with Christ must remain primary in any status of mine. With Him I can do everything, and without Him even everything will bring me no benefit.

One should not replace the main with the important, but it is necessary to establish what is a priority for me, and always have this at the foundation of any relationship. In my schedule there will always be important things, for the sake of which I will postpone everything that is not so essential. But the main thing should remain main and be my ultimate goal, which I need to achieve.

My main thing may differ from yours, and your main thing may even be unimportant to me. But in a family it is worth having one common goal that can be achieved together, otherwise you will have to go alone all your life in marriage. But this is not a problem if my main thing always remains main in my priorities.

But the problem may be that I don't know what is main for me, because all the important things take up all my time from morning to evening. How can I figure out myself? I cannot understand this myself, but God can do everything. He gently invites me to stop and know Him. Only He will give me a future and hope.

There can be no happiness outside of God. And even if I manage to build for myself a happy earthly life according to my concepts and remain in it until my death, but harm my soul, what benefit is there to me from this?

Family happiness can be where both spouses want to build it and do something for this, even without knowing God. But it will necessarily come into the life of those who have understood what should be main in life and have made this Main thing main.

God does not hide His laws of happiness, but neither does He hand them over to those who go through life frivolously. In building my happiness, my hands and my will must be involved, then my mind will accept this as an inevitable consequence of my searches and labors. And He who has become Main in my life will apply His hand and bless all my labors and searches, infinitely multiplying the fruit of my choice.

God's goal is that we all be happy in Him. He does everything for this that I allow Him. And if our goals coincide, then I risk becoming the happiest person already in this life and then for all Eternity to languish from happiness, making everyone around me happy.

If the important takes the place of the main, then my family will immediately notice this and will suffer together with me.

1. Please read: John 17:3; Prov. 4:7; Heb. 8:1; Ps. 89:10-12; Acts 6:1-3; Mark 8:36; Neh. 6:2-4; Luke 12:15-21; 21:2-4; Matt. 16:24-28; Eccl. 5:12-16; John 10:3,4,7-11; Titus 1:15-16; 1 Cor. 7:32-35; 13:1-3; Rev. 2:4,14 in light of this topic.

2. What did you understand from this topic?

3. What is main in your life?

4. How does the main differ from the important? Which of these should be first?

5. Can my "main" not correspond to God's expectation?

6. Are you sure that what you called your "main" is actually main for you?

7. If I ask God to show me what is in first place for me and what should be main, will He answer such a prayer?

8. Why is it so important that the "main" be my main and occupy the main place in my life?

9. What should I do if I am all in deeds and don't know what is main in my life and what my goal is? Ps. 45:11; Jer. 6:16.

10. Can the "main" of the other half differ from yours? Will this be a problem for your friendship?

11. Does following the "main" imply a change in my thinking? Mark 7:6-7.

12. Is it worth postponing all important things for the sake of the "main" and doing nothing else?

13. Do these lessons help to set priorities in your life?

14. What should I do if I realize that I am going in the wrong direction?

15. Is it worth making sure that my "main" direction of life has God's approval and blessing?