Forbidden Unions

Once, coming to worship, I received an invitation to a wedding that was to take place on Sunday in the building of our church. The bride was our sister Milana (name changed), and I did not know the groom. I inquired who this person was who wanted to take our sister as his wife. I was told that this guy was from the world, and he traditionally belongs to another confession. I was assured that he was a very good person, and that the young people loved each other. At that time I was only learning the science of love, but I was surprised that our responsible brothers agreed to such an event.

From church history I know that for such decisions our brethren were deprived of membership, but now for some reason someone decided that such an event should take place within the framework of our community. I am not stating that such an approach has become the norm in all German congregations and has become the doctrine of our church, but I have much evidence that in our days such actions are treated quite loyally and violators are not reprimanded.

I was not closely acquainted with Milana and therefore did not enter into discussion about this. I simply did not go anywhere, which many of the brethren did in response to such a violation of God's statutes.

The wedding took place, and when the newlyweds appeared at the meeting as a family, I wished them to love each other and something else good.

Time passed. The first days the young people came together to all worship services and knelt down together during prayer. Then Milana began to appear every other time alone, and a little later completely alone. Time passed, and Milana was no longer seen at worship, and her duties were performed by other people.

During my life in the church I saw many unions when my brethren created their families with unbelieving partners. With some of them I had communication before the conclusion of their marriage and tried to dissuade them. I simply observed others. But seeing determination and desire to go precisely this way, I stepped aside and waited for how it would end. From the statistics of my observations I derived a pattern. Such unions do not have God's blessing, and there are no exceptions to the rules. Some families collapse, someone leaves after this into the world, someone cools down and stops participating in the life of the church. All these people lose friends, but someone sometimes repents and tries to be restored, but they are no longer shown trust.

From the history of God's people we know that the unions of believing sons with unbelieving women were a curse for the spiritual brotherhood, and for this reason general apostasy came, and then came the flood, which destroyed all unfaithful people.

Leading the people of Israel out of Egypt, the Lord commanded not to enter into marriage unions with foreigners and not to give their daughters to pagans.

Such prohibitions were periodically renewed, but many biblical heroes were inclined to violate this command, and we see sad consequences.

There is one positive example of Ruth, who after the death of her husband accepted the faith of her mother-in-law and became for many of us a model of marital fidelity. She even entered into the genealogy of Jesus. But this is rather an exception than a rule.

As a believer I testify about God's love to all people. And very often the miracle of conversion happens, when someone responds to God's call and makes a covenant with God, and his unbelieving husband or wife prefers to remain in the world. The church accepts such people, and the new faith is a blessing for their families. These converted people actively participate in the life of the church and remain faithful to their Savior until death, although they suffer greatly from the fact that their family persists in their unbelief, and some children go into the world.

If you, reader, are not yet married, but love Jesus and want to create a family, then lay it on your heart to study God's will concerning union with an unbelieving person, in order to live in accordance with God's command.

No matter how kind and delicate your unbelieving friend may appear, but the very fact of his unbelief should become the most convincing proof that this is not your person. You should not bind your life with him.

Before marrying your chosen one, make sure that he is married to Christ, even if he is from your denomination. And you yourself must be in union with the Savior.

Our program is designed for those who already know God and have a personal relationship with him, who want to grow further in faith.

If you think that your union in violation of clear God's rules will be an exception, and your unbelieving partner will turn to God through your faith, then I want to disappoint you. Most likely you will lose God and go into the world. Swimming against the current alone is difficult, but possible. But if in your boat there is someone who constantly knocks the oars out of your hands, then you will not be able to get anywhere.

The exception will only be the case when you, having a family, believed in Christ and became God's son or daughter.

What is the danger of an unbelieving spouse? This is a completely different spirit in your home. Before the wedding this spirit can be quiet and obliging, and to win you, he is ready for any sacrifice. The enemy of the soul does not touch his subject, blessing him for union with you. But when "yes" "yes" sounds, then all the forces of evil begin to control the will of your unbelieving life companion, and you understand that an irreparable mistake has occurred, and something in your life is collapsing. Family happiness in Christ in this case simply cannot be.

With an unbelieving person you can have peace only on the conditions of his unbelief. In other situations, the evil spirit will always destroy everything that is repugnant to it.

God does not abandon His children even in such cases. He continues to protect and teach them while there is hope, but those who have fallen away leave God because they cannot withstand the constant opposition of evil forces and for the sake of peace in the family they give up and make concessions, and then compromise with sin.

Although this topic has recently caused much controversy and disagreement, nowhere in the Bible is there a single loophole to find justification for such unions and receive a blessing on what God cursed.

We can and should love and bless everyone, including our enemies, but God, although He sends rain and sun to the righteous and unrighteous, considers as His own only those faithful to Him and grants His Kingdom only to those who were faithful until death, to receive the crown of life.

To avoid fornication we are advised to have each his own wife. And if a person has fallen into fornication, he must repent or marry his girlfriend. Sin will never have blessing.

What God has declared unclean remains so forever. What God has cleansed should not be considered unclean.

If my children do not believe in God and create a family with those like themselves, then I have no right to interfere with them and will love them. If an unbelieving son wants to have a believing wife, then this will not bring blessing to the believing girl, even if the parents of her chosen one share her faith. The same applies to unbelieving daughters.

I want my children to be happy, but let this happiness have a true Biblical foundation and God's approval.

If a mistake has been made, then my repentance can correct everything, but the consequences of sin will remain in my life forever.

1. Please read: Gen. 6:2,5-7; 24:37-38; 28:1; Deut. 6:16; Ex. 34:15-16; Ruth 1:3-4,15-17; 4:13-17; Mal. 2:11-12; Ezra 9:1-3,12; 10:10; Neh. 10:30; 13:23-30; 1 Kings 1:3; 11:1-12; Acts 10:28; 2 Cor. 6:14-18; Matt. 7:24,26; 1 Cor. 7:2,10-17,23; Rom. 7:1-3 in light of this topic.

2. What did you understand from this topic?

3. Why did the Lord give a prohibition on marriage with unbelieving people?

4. What is the difference between a believing and unbelieving person? Maybe the main thing is that he be good and rich?

5. Do you know examples of unions described in this lesson?

6. Can it be that two people with different religious views will be able to live peacefully in their family? Should this be an example for us?

7. Does God's prohibition on creating a marriage union with unbelievers operate in our days?

8. What should be done if in a family both spouses did not believe in God, and then one of them believed, thereby bringing problems into the family?

9. Why cannot a believing and unbelieving person have complete God's blessing on common affairs? In whom or in what is the problem?

10. Is betrayal of God a sin? Is it possible to violate God's statutes with impunity?

11. Why in union with an unbelieving person does it most often happen that the believer loses faith and cools down, and not vice versa?

12. What influence will a pastor who entered into a forbidden marriage while carrying out ministry in the church have on you?

13. Does the state prohibit mixed marriages? What is the difference between church and state authority?

14. Does God call us to divorce unbelieving partners?

15. Is there hope for Eternal life for those who made a mistake in choosing a life partner?