Engagement

Engagement is the decision of a man and a woman to enter into marriage. In many cultures this has become a good tradition. And in it there is something solemn, bringing much joy in the anticipation of the celebration.

The groom, as a rule, desires to make this event romantic and long remembered. Sometimes the engagement can be captured on camera to later show friends and also to remember themselves in their young years.

Friendship with the purpose of building a family leads us to love from a pure heart and to the manifestation of mutual respect. Although we have plans for one another ahead of us, sober love so strongly unites our hearts that we acknowledge such a relationship only in God, not only among those who plan to marry, but also among those who believe in Jesus.

Love for one another has opened a beautiful path to our hearts, and in this experience we have understood how simply and sincerely we can love every person whom the Lord gives us.

We became so attached to one another that it became easier for us to create a family and continue to develop a relationship within it, rather than create nothing at all.

Love from God is wonderful in that it is not selfish and thinks first about the happiness of one’s neighbor, bringing joy to my heart when I can share love.

My chosen one is very dear to me, and I love her so much that I could spend hours listing all her virtues and discovering something new and special in her character. I understand that she is the one who, becoming my wife, will be the object of my constant attention, to whom I will never cease to serve and please throughout my life.

And I also understood one very important point in our friendship. I love my friend, I ask God for this love, and I receive it. And this love respects the choice of another person, even the dearest one. If suddenly my chosen one finds someone better and leaves me, I will not cease to love her as a friend and will do everything possible to ensure that she is happy in her new choice. And if I am invited to their wedding, I will give them the best gift I can think of. Although perhaps my pillow will be wet with tears. But these are just thoughts aloud, and this is not about us. Everything is right with us.

So, we came to the conclusion that we need a wedding, and our relationship has brought us exactly to this. I do not wish to take such a step in secret from our loved ones. My imagination sometimes surprises me, and I develop a unique plan of how best to make the proposal. I involve my friends so they can be witnesses and capture the moment on camera. My chosen one pretends to suspect nothing, although perhaps she truly does not. At the most suitable moment of our next meeting, against the background of beautiful nature, I give a signal to my videographers and solemnly carry out my wonderful plan for our shared future, in which such words should sound: “Will you marry me?” The bride thinks for a moment and gives a short (hopefully positive) answer, and then allows herself to be embraced in honor of such an event. Our friends are delighted and joyfully congratulate us.

In fact, the engagement has taken place. But all our loved ones need this event to be presented more officially with an established date of the wedding celebration. Before agreeing on these dates, my friend and I must clarify some details, inform our parents of our decision, and make an announcement in our church.

The period between engagement and wedding should not be long, but not too short either. I think that three months, which will be spent on preparation, is the maximum.

First, we submit an application to the civil registry office to legalize our relationship, and there we choose a convenient time for us.

It is desirable that our celebration falls on a weekend so that invited guests can attend peacefully. We decided that Saturday should remain a day of rest so that our friends are not involved in excessive fuss over wedding preparations. We also decided not to plan anything for Friday.

We also pay attention to ensure that women’s days do not fall on this time and end long before our event.

After that, we choose an ordained minister and agree with him and the leadership of our congregation on the day of the wedding ceremony and the scenario of our celebration.

We want our union to have God’s blessing, so we do not rush events and continue to keep our distance from each other and live separately, although our conversations together may already touch on many delicate questions that were previously inconvenient to ask.

We understand that, conditionally, we already belong to one another, and we do not want to change our decision, and this awareness fills our lives with special experiences. And even the “rose-colored glasses” are not so frightening, but we still do not want to put them on.

Our prayers have taken on a different form and have become more calm and serious. We continue to ask for God’s will, for protection, and for blessing on our future. Without God, it is better to build nothing.

If suddenly my friend decides before the wedding to leave God or the church and go into the world, then I will cancel all scheduled dates and take back all my proposals, notifying all our loved ones of the change in circumstances. Although through all this I will remain a friend.

Engagement is not yet a family, and much can be changed if something dangerous is revealed in our communication. There is no need to risk one’s spiritual life and salvation, but it is better to decide everything in the light of God’s will.

I believe in God not for receiving and satisfying personal needs, but in understanding higher values and expectations from the Savior Himself. He paid a very high price for our happiness and fenced it within the framework of His law so that obedience to His will would be a constant protection for us.

My chosen one, fortunately, turned out to be a faithful daughter of God and had views similar to mine, not planning to unite her life with an unbeliever. Such conditions did not become an obstacle to the anticipation of upcoming joy, and we spend time happily together, thoroughly discussing all questions of the wedding celebration. The less money we and our parents have for this event, the fewer and simpler our plans.

The only area in which I do not want to put up any obstacles is the choice of the bride’s dress. Here my friend must decide for herself what and how to wear, but in such a way that everything is decent and covers what must be covered according to the reform of dress. Although I do not interfere with this choice and close my eyes to the price, I openly express my protest if the wife’s body will be uncovered. Modesty and chastity must be everywhere.

We also choose the place and cuisine for the wedding feast, considering the reform of diet and the tastes of the invited guests. Alcohol is unequivocally excluded from our menu, and its absence will not make our celebration boring. And our friends are already preparing a program to entertain all the guests.

How much fuss in all these events! Things could be simpler, but this is how it is customary for us, and in this there is something solemn and significant. For there will also be a great celebration in Heaven at the wedding of Christ and His bride. And we plan to be there as the main participants.

1. Please read Amos 3:3; John 13:35; Genesis 24:49-52, 57-59, 67; 29:18-21; Ezekiel 18:4-9; 1 Corinthians 7:28, 33-34; Song of Solomon 2:4; Colossians 3:14; Philippians 1:8-11; Revelation 19:7-9 in light of this topic.

2. What did you understand from this topic?

3. What other verses from the Bible came to your mind?

4. What is the purpose of engagement?

5. What happens in the hearts and minds of those who have declared their decision to create a family?

6. Is it possible to marry without an engagement? If so, how would that look?

7. Read Ruth 1:16-17. How can this statement be described? Does the Bible give us any useful advice in this? Should every bride think this way before entering into marriage?

8. Have you had a desire to learn the marriage vow from the book of Ruth 1:16-17 and apply it in your life?

9. Is it worth promising yourself to an unfamiliar friend before marriage? What if he leaves you?

10. Is it important to always be a friend, even if it did not work out to create a family? (Proverbs 17:17).

11. Does the Lord act in my life according to my decisions?

12. Will Jesus make a proposal to His bride before the wedding? (Revelation 3:18).

13. For what period is the marriage union concluded? And how long does it last? Should we understand the answer to this question?

14. Do those who wish to marry have the opportunity before the wedding to think everything through well before giving final consent?

15. Is love necessary in creating a family? How can we understand that it is genuine and mutual?