Birthdays

In our family, certain holidays and traditions were established which do not have biblical foundations, but which we really enjoy and which bring special joy into our relationship. Some of these holidays coincide with worldly ones, but we do not make a cult out of this and do not impose anything on anyone, nor do we consider it something obligatory. All of this is our family decision, and based on our choice we set aside dates for ourselves that we spend differently than other days, experiencing special joy.

One of our family traditions is the celebration of our birthdays. This is our private holiday, for which we prepare in a special way and which we spend without involving other people in our life. I take vacation ahead of time for this and do not plan any business, so that I can spend the whole day together with the one whom I received as a gift from the Lord.

At the very beginning of our friendship, we discussed this matter and even tried not to give these days special significance, but to regard them as something ordinary. However, later we understood that this deprived us of the opportunity to do something special for our friendship and family happiness. On this very day, we have a kind of solemn expectation of something joyful, and there is no escaping it. And if your closest people do not react at all to your expectations, then it becomes somehow sad because of their indifference.

As for gifts, we decided not to spend money on something unnecessary just for the sake of having a gift. If something is to be given, then only what is necessary and brings joy.

We also decided to mark in our wall calendar all the birthdays of our friends and to give them our kind words, declarations of love and friendship, and wishes for special blessings. It happened that for some people we were the only ones who remembered them on that day. We heard many opinions that all this is worldly and that it is necessary to ignore these holidays on principle, but seeing how much joy our attention and kind words bring to people on this day, and how happy those whom we congratulate become, how our hearts anticipate something special, we decided that we would observe this tradition in our family and bring happiness to those we know.

Before each holiday, we discuss how we will celebrate it and what we will do on that day. And if one of us decides to present a surprise and keep it secret, then we have to humbly wait in anticipation of something unusual. In another surprise, what is important is not what was prepared for you, but how much love was invested in it.

Once I decided to make a surprise for my wife on her birthday and did not warn her about it. I invited many members of our church to our home in the evening, without telling anyone how many of us there would be. Each one thought that he would be the only guest and agreed to his visit. I bought food for the guests in advance and hid it in the house, and also asked one friend to bring his field kitchen in order to treat everyone to something special.

And so the day came. Beautiful words of congratulations were spoken, necessary gifts were presented, and bright prospects were promised. We talked a lot and discussed our family matters in a spirit of love and harmony. By evening, my wife was tired and was going to rest in her own way, but at the appointed time invited guests began to appear. Someone arrived a little earlier and sang a song for my wife, which delighted her greatly. And when the set time came, the guests poured in as if from a horn of plenty. My wife looked at me with bewilderment, as if asking: “What is this?” And I let her know that everything was fine and that she should not worry. I had prepared a large table outside and began to bring out the food, while my friend’s field kitchen was running at full capacity, filling everything around with the pleasant aroma of delicious delicacies.

From my observation I understood that all the guests were also surprised that they were not the only ones. They and my wife asked me with their eyes the same questions, to which I gave them the same answers.

When there were very many of us in one square meter, then everyone had to accept it, and we welcomed each new late-arriving guest with special joy, who did not hide his surprise at such a company. The children who came with their parents immediately found something to do and joyfully played at something. And the adults sat at the table that was set, and after praying, began to eat, sharing jokes and witty sayings.

I knew that many of the guests did not have close friendships with each other, but our hospitality and friendliness united everyone into one cheerful community, and by our prayers our Lord was with us that evening.

I tried to serve the guests as best I could, finding out all their needs and striving to please everyone. As a result, the whole gathering came to peace, and at the end of the meal it was suggested that we sing some of our favorite songs.

I had warned all the neighbors in advance that we would have guests because of the celebration, since I knew that such events do not pass without noise.

Our singing spread throughout the neighborhood, filling the atmosphere with special reverence. One song followed another. And then I suggested to each guest that he present my wife with his favorite verse from the Bible. We all listened together to the words of blessings, rejoicing that they had passed through the centuries and preserved their power and purity until our days, to be poured out like such a wonderful waterfall into my wife’s soul. And she sat, tired and happy, leaning against me.

When it grew dark, the guests began to leave. Some left without saying goodbye. And some said goodbye and did not go anywhere. Some helped to clean all the dishes and tidy up, while others continued to cheerfully communicate with my wife.

When we were left alone, I heard a request not to make such surprises again or at least to give advance notice about them. I took note of this and decided in the future to be more considerate and prudent.

When my birthday came, my wife always prepared something special at that time and gave herself for the whole day, trying to be very helpful and cheerful. But everything came down to the usual rhythm of life, and we communicated a lot on that day, discussing all our plans for the future.

Once my wife also made me a surprise on my birthday by secretly inviting my friends, who sat in one of the rooms and quietly waited for me to come home and enter that room. I was very glad and surprised by their visit, and our meeting passed in pleasant fellowship.

In our family traditions there is something that belongs only to the two of us and is not imposed on anyone else. We do not discuss this matter with anyone, since we believe that it is in our power to arrange such events and decide how and what to celebrate and how to treat it.

There are also spontaneous exceptions when I take my wife, drive her to the ends of the earth, and make her an unexpected holiday just like that, without any dates, not promising that this will now become a tradition.

And, of course, any of our family holidays we consider within the framework of God’s law, so that all our human matters are in complete harmony with the Divine.

1. Please read Rom.14:15; Gal.6:9-10; John 13:34-35; 1Pet.1:22; Eccl.2:24; 5:17; 8:15; Esth.9:18-22; Rom.12:9-10; 13:9-10; 1Tim.1:5; 2Tim.3:17; 2Thess.3:13; James 4:17 in the light of this lesson.

2. What did you understand from this topic?

3. What other verses from the Bible came to your mind?

4. Is it bad to celebrate some event with friends?

5. Can we make our own holidays and establish our own family traditions?

6. Is it right to impose your values on other people?

7. Read Mark 6:21. Does this verse teach that celebrating a birthday is bad?

8. How do your birthdays go?

9. What holidays and gatherings are dangerous to attend?

10. Is every family tradition normal in the eyes of Heaven?

11. Do you enjoy making kind surprises for your friends and loved ones?

12. What should you do if you want to make a family holiday, but your spouse does not want it, or vice versa?

13. Is it important to ensure that our family traditions and holidays are not sinful and dangerous for the soul?

14. What traditions will there be in Eternity? (Isa.66:23).

15. Do you enjoy congratulating your friends on their holidays?