A Serious Conversation

One morning, as I was getting ready for work and enjoying a delicious breakfast with my wife, I wanted to know what I would have for lunch. She cheerfully listed everything she had prepared and packed in my bag. Right away I began praising my little homemaker, wondering aloud what I would ever do without her, how I would suffer from hunger, and how impossible life would be without her. She always rejoiced that, thanks to her, my life had been transformed, but out of modesty she insisted that everything would have been fine anyway. I could never agree with that.

After breakfast, my wife asked me if I could talk with her that evening, because she had something serious to tell me. I immediately became alert and tried to find out the subject of the upcoming talk, but she avoided answering, asking me to wait until evening. I had no choice but to agree and resign myself to the unknown.

All day I was left with thoughts, praying continually for myself and my wife. Many ideas came into my mind. Somehow I felt that nothing bad should happen, but the seriousness of what was ahead kept me uneasy.

I set aside all other plans, and when I came home, I announced that I was ready to listen and to talk. My wife invited me to pray and began thanking God for me, asking Him to bring to my awareness the full meaning of what she was about to share. Listening to each word, I tried to guess what she was going to say. I felt no guilt or reason to expect something negative, yet inside I was tense.

I sat down on our “conversation sofa,” while she, as usual, perched on the armrest beside me, looking at me intently before quietly asking if I loved her. I affirmed that I did, and focused all my attention on her.

She gently fixed my hair, as if unhurriedly preparing me for her secret, while I patiently waited, deciding not to ask unnecessary questions but to let her speak first. She sat close, admiring me with a mysterious smile, smoothing my appearance with her kind hands.

Then she assured me of her love too, and once again fell silent, leaning her cheek against me. We sat quietly for a few minutes, waiting for the moment of revelation.

Then she asked how deeply I loved her. In response, I hugged her tightly, holding her close, which was clearly what she wanted. Then she asked, “Do you know?” and stopped. I answered that I didn’t, but if she told me, then I would know. She looked into my eyes intently again, while I quietly waited.

Finally, she said: “You have no idea what you mean to me, how much my life has been transformed because of you, and what I am experiencing now under the influence of your love.” I grew very curious and listened with all my attention, trying to understand where she was going.

My wife searched for the right words to clearly express her thoughts, while I tried to piece together the mosaic of her words into a complete picture.

She continued: “You and your steadfast love helped me discover myself. I never even imagined who I really am, or what qualities I truly possess. I never thought of myself as a bad person, but I also didn’t know the gifts of my soul. From the beginning, even in our friendship, when you started uncovering my hidden talents and traits, explaining how they showed in my life, I realized God was using you to show me something important. I wrote everything down and deeply reflected on your discoveries. And you, tirelessly, kept diving into the depths of my soul, sharing each new finding with me. Together we marveled at how you managed to see all this and describe it so simply. You helped me realize my uniqueness and worth in God’s eyes. And I understand now that without unconditional love, these discoveries would never have been possible. Only God’s love, revealed through you, convinced me not to fear your exploration and to let you into places no one had ever been. And when you asked me to be your wife, I knew the Lord wanted to keep blessing me with discoveries through you, and seeing no serious obstacle to our union, I gave you my “yes,” a decision I have never once regretted. Thank you, my dear one, for being you!”

I sat listening, trying to understand my role in all of this. I always enjoyed noticing good things in people, but I never realized the influence my words could have on someone’s consciousness. I began to grasp the deep meaning of her words and rejoiced that the Lord could use me in such a beautiful way.

She continued: “Because of your exploration of my soul’s qualities, I began to notice them too and develop them fully, rejoicing in these discoveries within myself. You convince me so strongly of who I really am that I can only agree with you and rejoice in our relationship of love. And as I develop these traits, I grow in them and delight in the amazing changes. God is using you to show me something great and hidden that I never knew. Thank you, my beloved!”

I realized that all this was being said about me, yet everything I had done was under the influence of the Holy Spirit, often without realizing how it affected my bride. And she wasn’t the only one in whom I noticed good things, but she had let me into her heart so deeply that I was extremely careful not to harm anything there. The Lord used our mutual trust and turned it all into a blessing.

I also reflected on how deeply my wife had entered my heart, and how many wonderful things she had found in me. In that reflection, I realized that I too had undergone meaningful changes and growth.

She went on: “Seeing your genuine interest in my inner being, and how it benefits you and others, I was able to cultivate all this and now I am firmly convinced that without you, my love, I never could have become who I am today in your hands. Please don’t stop, but continue doing what you do so well! Thank you so much for being in my life. Be here always. I receive you with love and joy. And this is very serious for me, because you do all this in the name of God, letting Him be your Head.”

My tension disappeared, replaced with sincere joy for such a wonderful gift from the Lord—this chance to make someone better and happier. I had no argument against her words and had to accept everything she said about me as the truth. Joy filled my heart, and I realized I was holding something priceless that cannot be measured by anything earthly. I saw that before us lies an eternity of wonderful discoveries in each other, which will help transform us and make our lives into something even more beautiful—something we have not yet fully experienced, but which is still ahead.

1. Please read 1 Cor. 16:14; Song of Solomon 1:1-2,15-16; 2:3-10,16; 3:1,4; 4:7,10-12; 5:1-2,8-16; 6:3-4,10; 7:7,11-13; 8:3,6-7,14; Gal. 5:6; 1 Pet. 1:22; 1 Thess. 3:12 in light of this lesson.

2. What did you understand from this topic?

3. What other Bible verses came to your mind?

4. Should a wife love her husband? Does the Bible give a command for wives to love their husbands?

5. Can a husband’s love, kindness, and attentiveness open his wife’s heart?

6. Is love strong enough to conquer any heart?

7. Can love bring goodness into the life of your spouse?

8. Is love able to discover and reveal something unique and hidden in the heart of another?

9. Have you noticed how people wrap themselves tighter in strong wind but freely uncover themselves under warm sunshine? Can the same be true in family and friendship?

10. Do you know that every person carries within themselves an unlimited potential of countless talents?

11. What is the best way to uncover hidden qualities in your spouse—by shovel and excavator, or with tenderness and love?

12. Are there people in your life who see you as a wonderful person filled with treasures?

13. Can a person discover themselves alone, or is a loving friend necessary?

14. Do you enjoy when someone lovingly tells you how beautiful and unique you are?

15. Why does love see and discover so much good in a person, while strict justice sees only faults and mistakes?