Divorce

We read a verse from the prophet Malachi in the Kulakov translation, Mal. 2:16: "I hate divorce, says the Lord God of Israel, and when you turn the covering under which a wife was taken into violence against her, says the Lord of hosts. Guard your spirit, do not be unfaithful!" In other translations this verse begins with the words: "I hate divorce..."

Divorce is the destruction of a marital union by one or both sides with subsequent legal registration, as a result of which a person receives a Certificate of Divorce and by secular law is considered free, having the legal right to create a new family.

Not so long ago, not only in the church, but also in the world, divorce was considered something extraordinary, and those who went through this procedure were declared unreliable people and had corresponding censure within the framework of the society to which they belonged. Now time has made certain adjustments to this question, and the attitude toward this procedure has become more loyal. But we also have God's point of view on this question and will reckon with it.

The foundational teaching of the true church of God speaks of marital union thus:

"Marriage was established by God in Eden and confirmed by Jesus as a union of love between a man and a woman, concluded for life. Entering marriage, Christians should choose a spouse among their fellow believers. Concluding marriage, they take upon themselves obligations not only to each other, but also before God. Mutual love, honor, respect and responsibility are the foundation of their relationships. They reflect the love, holiness, closeness and constancy of relationships between Christ and His Church. Regarding divorce, Jesus taught that a person who divorces his spouse, except in cases of adultery, and marries another, commits adultery. Although the life of some families may turn out to be far from ideal, spouses who have completely devoted themselves to each other in marital union in Christ can achieve close unity in love under the guidance of the Holy Spirit and with the care of the Church..."

Marriage is one of the strictest establishments of the Creator Himself. According to the words of Jesus from Matt. 5:32, dissolution of this union and repeated creation of a new family is permitted only when the seventh commandment is violated: "You shall not commit adultery" Ex. 20:14.

In our time divorce and repeated marriages have become such a frequent phenomenon that even church ministers sometimes find themselves perplexed when considering such situations, not wanting to lose members of their congregations. Somewhere this is treated strictly, somewhere loyally, and somewhere they manage to publicly bless those who violate clear God's establishment.

The lawlessness that spouses allow into their hearts becomes the most destructive force, which cools love in relationships and prompts husband and wife to forget their solemn promises, following their carnal lusts, being guided not by principle, but by feelings.

The reason for divorce permitted by God is violation of physical faithfulness. As lawlessness and human cruelty multiply, many other factors have appeared that serve as a reason for dissolution of marital relationships. Divorce is not a sin that deprives a person of the right to Eternal life. The Lord has given each of us freedom in self-determination and respects our choice. He continues to love equally both married people and divorced ones. Sin originates where people transgress God's prohibitions and seek justification for their actions.

Remarriage with a living even former spouse is a special case that should be carefully examined. If the reason for divorce was the fact of adultery, or the divorced spouse began cohabiting with another person, then the innocent party has full moral right to create a new family with a representative of their church. In all other cases, remarriage causes many misunderstandings among fellow believers and brings temptation into church brotherhood.

A lawful reason for divorce can be rude or violent behavior, threat to life or health, immoral corruption having a corrupting influence on family members, sinful dependencies and similar things. But divorce in such cases does not give the right to remarriage. The innocent party continues in God's eyes to be the wife or husband of that person with whom they made a union, until death separates them. We cannot indicate any other reasons, allowing new marital relationships contrary to God's will. And we cannot bless these unions.

There are exceptions to this rule, when divorce occurred outside the church, after which a person believed and accepted Christ. Then it is accepted to consider him free and give him the right to create a family within church society. But this order was not established by me, but is so accepted.

Each case of remarriage should be carefully considered by church ministers and brought to the church council. And if there are no Biblical obstacles and objections, then the marriage is accepted and blessed by the entire brotherhood.

A reason for lawful divorce can be verbal assurance by one of the spouses of physical infidelity, when he jokingly or seriously declares this to his other half. This fact is very difficult to prove without obvious evidence, and words about infidelity in this case are themselves a weighty argument that need not be proven.

A controversial question for lawful divorce can be the fact of viewing pornography. A person who is subject to this vice can no longer perceive his spouse as that unique one to whom he promised his faithfulness. With any physical contact he is in his heart not with her, but with those images that he let into his mind. And what should a wife expect from such a partner? And how does she feel about herself? In light of Jesus' words, such a person is considered an adulterer, but while there is no fact of physical infidelity, divorce from such people does not give the right to remarriage.

Those who wish to divorce should understand one most important thing, that Eternal life is worth fighting for and enduring all the charms of lonely life. There will be temptations, there will be enticing offers, but do not allow sin into your life.

In our time there are many counselors and thinkers, but let your criterion be the words: "Thus it is written!"

There is one more common type of cunning. When divorced church members go to conscious violation of God's order, and they are excluded from church for this. But then they come with "repentance" and ask to be restored through repeated baptism. We, fellow believers, will accept such, but how God looks at such intrigues is difficult to say.

When I create my family, then this union is created forever, and what God has joined together, let man not separate.

Although the statistics of divorces even in God's church are quite high, this does not give me moral right to unpunished addition to this statistics by my actions.

It is also worth remembering that even after divorce, love continues to unchangingly love the one for whom it was given, and who violated the marriage contract with their lustful actions. It does not pass, but changes its attitude, not allowing the grieved soul to perish in the darkness of offenses, heavy memories and bleeding wounds of the experienced tragedy.

1. Please read Matt. 5:27-32; 19:3-12; Mark 10:2-12; Luke 16:17-18; Heb. 13:4; 1 Cor. 7:8-17; Deut. 24:1-4; Jer. 3:1; 1 Cor. 7:27 in light of this lesson.

2. What other verses from the Bible came to your memory?

3. What did you understand from this topic?

4. Have you experienced divorce in your life, yours or your parents'?

5. Is divorce always something very bad?

6. What other weighty reasons for divorce do you know?

7. Is breaking relationships the only solution for solving family problems?

8. What to do if husband and wife cannot live together and do not want to divorce?

9. What do you think the Lord experiences when He sees the break of relationships between His children?

10. For whom was the commandment "You shall not commit adultery" given?

11. Why did Jesus not give any new reasons for divorce?

12. Should I know something about divorce if I don't have a family yet?

13. When family life is not going well, what can be invented instead of divorce?

14. What paths of restoration after divorce would you advise to the injured party?

15. Is it always better not to divorce?