Family subordination

When I first heard the word "subordination," I for some reason decided that it meant "distance" and applied it exactly in this context when it came to relationships between the sexes. And such equally "literate" listeners respectfully listened to me, just as I once did, not understanding the true meaning of this word. "Subordination" sounds so savory and so strongly emphasizes the thought that you don't need to explain much.

For example, I say: "I observe subordination in communication with sisters and in relation to the female sex." They listen to me with a smart look and nod their heads in approval. And an understanding person would most likely laugh at such a statement.

Once I decided to check this word on the internet and understand its true meaning and was surprised at how the whole world incorrectly interprets it. It turns out that subordination is a hierarchy, where lower ranks strictly obey higher ones, and higher ones command and manage those who are under their subordination.

The best example of subordination is military hierarchy, where a private soldier is the lowest executive link of an entire chain of commanders, and the supreme commander-in-chief is the highest legal force. With such an arrangement, each serviceman knows his place and unswervingly executes orders of higher leadership, thereby guaranteeing discipline and success in fulfilling assigned tasks.

What will happen if someone in this hierarchy of power decides to act according to his own understanding of what is happening and self-confidently takes the place of a chief, deciding to command those to whom he should submit? Chaos and disorder will begin.

If we take our grammar, then subordination is also present in it between words in constructing sentences, which emphasizes and strengthens needed thoughts and meanings, helping to transmit information more accurately and competently.

Our Christian world is also arranged according to the principle of subordination, where the head of the wife is the husband, the Head of the husband is Christ, and the Head of Christ is God. 1 Cor. 11:3.

When each in such a chain is in his place and consciously does not violate this order, then no serious problems arise. The most interesting thing is that in God's hierarchy the higher serve the lower, and the higher the occupied level, the greater spirit of service is present in the heart.

Such power and order are established by God, who always remains in His place and lovingly serves all His subordinates. All this is beautifully conceived and works. And if subordination exists in the family, then everyone in the family is under the protection and covering of authority higher than themselves.

What actually happens? The enemy of the soul has introduced such confusion into relationships that the concepts of man and woman in the family have shifted or blurred. When the house is managed by two wives, then they will not resolve many questions in the right spirit. Or if two heads, two husbands appear in the family, then there will be a war of worlds. Or if the husband does not have Christ at his head, and he does not want to serve, but strives to rule and dictate according to his own will, then conflict cannot be avoided. As a result, there has been a confusion of concepts, and there is no God's hierarchy. But for family happiness it is necessary to restore everything exactly as the Lord expects, and introduce into this chain of subordination the right spirit of relationships, which is called love.

There is another common type of family rebellion, when a wife, thinking that she occupies the position assigned to her, begins directly or indirectly to undermine her husband's authority. How can this be expressed? The most visible and primitive is verbal insult with the use of such words that humiliate male dignity and put him in the same category as pack animals. Also insults can be not so rude, but sound quite harmless, like: "You won't succeed in anything"; "Again you started another stupidity"; "You'd better do some real work."

When strangers are present in the house, then in their presence you can very successfully humiliate the head of the family, publicly ridiculing his behavior, or make it clear by your attitude that he is nobody compared to the "queen" of the house.

The essence of these and other manifestations of such a spirit is that the husband's authority is undermined, and he, seeing such an attitude, becomes disappointed and loses the desire to fulfill his direct duties, which brings an even greater storm of already deserved insults.

When I served in the army, we had visible order, but we soldiers understood quite well which officers needed to be listened to, and who had no authority. The officers understood this too and could do nothing about it, since the "grandfathers" were the main commanders in the unit. Such a spirit played an evil joke on me, and at the end of my service I was almost sent to a disciplinary battalion. Whatever intrigues we try to build against established authority, it is worth remembering that all authority from God has enough power to suppress any rebellion within its community.

The family is the most complex cell of society, in which there are generally accepted values and norms, but which is formed according to personal perception and will of both sides. Subordination helps create the correct structure of the family, which, when everything is in its place, is easy to fill with everything necessary for common happiness.

Imagine a soldier who suddenly decided that being a colonel is much more interesting, and he has all the abilities for this, and he not only decided this, but confidently goes toward his goal and behaves accordingly. It's funny, because the system itself excludes such ambitions. But when such things begin to happen in the family, this often succeeds. And such things do not happen accidentally. This happens purposefully and uncompromisingly.

Some acquaintances of mine, who have their own private sanatorium, shared with me how once one of the new employees decided to become the boss and set himself as such in relation to other workers. He even began to point out their mistakes to the owners and ambiguously hinted that only he could solve all questions correctly if they gave him power and access to finances. They had to part with this "talented" person.

Violation of subordination in the family takes its roots from Heaven, when one cherub desired to exalt himself and take God's place.

What does a wife who violates God's family structure gain? She risks losing her family or depriving her loved ones of family happiness. And along with this she can also lose the right to Eternity. Rebellion, however small it may be, is a spirit unacceptable in Heaven.

Of course, it happens that the husband himself refuses to be the head of the family and takes the status of a couch consumer. And the poor wife takes upon herself the functions of breadwinner, driver, plumber, planner out of desperation, for the sake of preserving the family. Then the Lord gives His daughter all necessary knowledge and strength so that she can cope with all assigned tasks. But this should also not be considered the norm of life.

Love in relationships brings us to harmony with God's plan and creates from our family that union which the Creator dreams of seeing. Everyone is in his place. Subordination is observed, and all family members have God's protection and successfully develop in this.

1. Please read 1 Cor. 11:3; Rom. 13:1-10; Phil. 2:3; Eph. 5:22-25,33; Eccl. 5:7-8; Mark 9:33-37; John 13:12-17; 1 Sam. 15:22; 1 Pet. 1:22; 3:1-10; 2 Cor. 10:4-6; Matt. 20:25-28 in light of this lesson.

2. What other verses from the Bible came to your memory?

3. What did you understand from this topic?

4. What is family subordination?

5. Can I decide for myself how the structure of my family should look?

6. Why did the Lord establish a certain family order, common to all times and peoples?

7. How will a family with two heads look?

8. Does the true status of a wife in family hierarchy deprive her of the right to clearly express her position or disagreement with violation of ethical or family norms?

9. Why do husbands sometimes not want to be head of the family, or wives strive for this power?

10. Is a person born with understanding of what his family should be like, and what is needed for my family happiness?

11. Why should both husband and wife participate in building family happiness?

12. What to do if I understand that my family model does not correspond to God's plan, but my other half does not want to understand this?

13. Can I be head of the family if my wife does not consider me such and demonstrates this in every way?

14. Do these lessons help you reconsider something in your life?

15. Have the knowledge received in this School changed anything in your life?