Should One Divorce?

In the life of every family, unpredictable conflict situations may arise, which the enemy of the soul will use to destroy relationships and sow seeds of disappointment, alienation, pride, and offense.

When discord occurs for any reason, then Satan immediately comes with his arsenal of services and his main deception called: “You must divorce!” And when conflicting spouses are overwhelmed by negative emotions and feelings, it is very easy for the enemy to root in their hearts the thought of dissolving the marriage, and then to persuade their imperfect minds to bring this matter to an end, regardless of the consequences.

Divorce is a psychological and legal process of ending a marriage, which includes the division of property, determination of parental rights and responsibilities toward children, as well as other legal matters.

An important aspect of this process is the protection of the interests of children and the creation of conditions for their well-being. The court may decide how financial support for the children will be provided, in whose custody they will be, how parental responsibilities will be distributed, how parents may meet with their children, and how much time they may spend with them.

The reasons for divorce can vary, from foolish and trivial disagreements to serious and life-threatening dangers and actions within the family. If one looks at the root of all these reasons, it is selfishness of one or both spouses.

Selfishness is the absolute opposite of love. It tends to grow endlessly, which ends with the absolute right to death.

Love also has an inexhaustible potential for perfection and self-development, whose end is Eternal Life.

Many people create families because they are tired of being alone, and then divorce for the very same reason.

When a serious disagreement arises, the enemy of the soul immediately seeks to divide the spouses emotionally, and then to rule over each separately, implanting his methods to aggravate the crisis. This is a very strong influence of the powers of evil in the heavenly places, and it should not be underestimated. In such a state of mind, a person is unable to think adequately and make sober and correct decisions.

Help at such a time of testing may come from:

* God’s principles, written in the mind and heart;

* wise people, who will immediately evaluate the situation and point to the best way;

* prayer to God for intervention and wisdom from above;

* unconditional love, which a person has previously come to know;

* time, which does not rush into radical decisions, but gives an opportunity for passions and tensions to subside, to understand the true cause of the conflict, and to point to the possibility of resolving the problem.

In any case, it is important to resolve not to take hasty actions in carrying out bad plans.

Divorce is a bad solution, and sometimes a very bad one.

When a person’s leg is sick, I don’t think the best solution would be to amputate it. Any sensible doctor will first prescribe treatment, give advice, and recommend medication in order to save, relieve, and heal your leg. And you yourself, seeing what is happening, will cry out in prayer to God and ask not for amputation, but for healing. You will spare no expense just to avoid losing that part of your body which is yours and without which you cannot live.

And even if that leg becomes numb and no longer responds to the body and nerve impulses, you still will not remove it, but will take the necessary measures to live with it further and drag it along through life until death, not losing hope that it might unexpectedly heal. You will buy crutches or a wheelchair, adapt your home to new conditions, but you will by no means part with your useless leg.

And if the leg simply hurts but normally performs its functions, then you will have to put up with the pain and somehow live.

Of course, if the disease of the leg becomes a mortal danger to your health and body, then nothing else will remain but to lose it forever, however painful that may be.

Love teaches us to approach any family disagreements with wisdom and a different perspective. It soberly evaluates any conflict and makes the decision to love. No matter how deeply a proud heart is wounded, love allows God to place into a person’s nature a different heart, sensitive to God’s principles and statutes.

Any crisis in relationships, love perceives as a new opportunity for its manifestation, as a springboard for the free flight of thought and feelings in the given direction.

Any situation, no matter how difficult, love sees from another perspective and evaluates from the position of love and respect for the freedom of choice and actions of another person.

Love does not think evil, and therefore any decision made from love will not harm the soul, but will enrich the treasury of wisdom and life experience.

Love knows how to make the right decisions to love not only in one’s own family, but also in the lives of other families. It is able to share its experience and tell of the victories of its principles, persuading listeners to choose the path of love and forgiveness.

For some, it may seem unthinkable to live in unbearable family conditions where one has to do everything alone and earn one’s own living, but love gives meaning even to such a way of life, investing itself fully into every action.

We read in Galatians 6:7-9: “Do not be deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting. And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.”

The fruits of our harvest are not always immediately visible, but there are certain principles that we accept by faith and wait for their fulfillment. Sowing love, I do not expect these seeds to bring forth fruits of malice and selfishness, although the reaction to my actions may be just that. But the seed of love will surely sprout and bear much fruit, which, if not pleasing to my other half, will nourish me and all the Heavenly host.

Where love reigns, Satan can do nothing. There will simply be no place for his temptations, especially if love is mutual.

Love is the banner of victory for the conqueror of the last days, and the family is the place where the most difficult lessons are learned in the formation of character and the honing of skills for taking ground. Love teaches me to distinguish good from evil and to choose the better. It cannot force another to act with love, but when my heart is under its power, it helps me to apply the strategy that gives me victory.

Should one divorce when trials have come into my life and new opportunities for the manifestation of love have opened? Of course, I am not always ready for the blows of fate, which fall unexpectedly or from behind, but love always protects my spirit from manifestations of selfish nature and gives joy in such trials, and even more so in the ultimate victory.

If your spouse is of a completely different spirit, and there is no chance of his salvation even with all your unconditional love, then prepare yourself for the fact that you will enter Eternity without him, and keep loving.

1. Please read Eph. 4:15; 1 Cor. 13:4-8; 16:14; Prov. 11:29; John 17:3; Isa. 40:28-31; Ps. 106:9; Gal. 5:6,13; 6:7-9; Hos. 8:7; Eph. 4:1-4; 1 Thess. 3:12; 5:14-24; Rev. 3:21 in the light of this lesson.

2. What other Bible verses came to your mind?

3. What useful insights are there for you in this lesson?

4. What did you understand from this topic?

5. Should one divorce the one he promised to love in any situation?

6. Do you think love can change everything for the better in your life?

7. We read in Isa. 58:12: “...and thou shalt be called, The repairer of the breach...” Is it within the power of a loving person to receive such a title in his family?

8. How can one understand that the way of love is far better than grievances and resentments when everything in the family is collapsing?

9. If you have a family, has there ever been a time when thoughts of divorce came during a conflict? How did you think about it later, when the conflict subsided and you experienced joyful moments in the arms of your other half?

10. Can the Lord correct the situation in a collapsing family if you begin to ask Him for help and love?

11. Should every conflict be regarded as an opportunity to learn something?

12. Is it necessary to create a family if there are so many problems in it?

13. Do you believe that love conquers all and makes victorious the one who is guided by it?

14. Why do conflicts and disagreements bring with them disappointments and bad thoughts? How can and should this be resisted?

15. Do you find in the life of Christ those examples of behavior and His reactions to evil that would help you resist evil in your family?