Love Through Gifts

Creating our world, the Lord created in it everything necessary for the life and happiness of future inhabitants and hid many interesting things so that later, being found, they could bring much joy with them. I think that every thing, from a small grain of sand to the great sun, was made with love and with special tenderness and wisdom to bring us constant joy and benefit. And all this was given to us just like that in eternal possession.

But the most valuable Gift that one can imagine was handed to fallen humanity as a symbol of eternal God's love, to forever become our heritage. We read in John 3:16: "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." The Lord handed over this Gift forever with meaning. In this gift God gave us all Heaven and all His good heart, and now watches how we accept this Gift and how we use it.

And what gift awaits all the faithful in the near future? It's hard to imagine, but it already exists and is called "Eternity," in which Jesus, the Father and the Holy Spirit will constantly gladden our hearts.

A gift is what the recipient did not deserve. This is what the giver gives forever. This is what expresses his love, gratitude and respect. A gift that is payment for something cannot be considered a gift. And if it is handed over with the purpose of receiving future benefits, then it is more like a bribe than an undeserved surprise.

Gifts are customarily given on special dates, on traditional holidays and just like that, by special inspiration and disposition of the heart.

Often we don't know what we will be given next time and how useful this gift will be to us, but we always expect something pleasant and beautiful. And how joyful it is to receive something into which the love of a close friend is invested. Gifted things can carry in themselves the positive charge of the love invested in them and for many years remind us of this, causing tenderness and joy.

Small children have no concept of the value of money and that there is a difference in the cost of things. But they gladly accept and appreciate what falls into their hands, begin to use what cannot be immediately broken or spoiled.

For some children, and adults too, gifts are that love language through which their heart best perceives your kind attitude and accepts your love.

When choosing and presenting a gift, it is very important for parents to invest their love in it and precisely with it to give children what they did not deserve. But wisdom and understanding should be present in such action that no gift will replace you, your friendly attitude, your time, your help and kind words, gentle touches and care for the child's emotional needs. Your children need you entirely, and a gift is one of the wonderful opportunities to tell about your love for children exactly this way.

A gift that is needed and useful or that is dreamed about will always be accepted with pleasure and joy. Before acquiring or making something, it is worth being interested in the child's desires and understanding how much he will need and benefit from it.

It is important to consider the influence of all kinds of advertisements, promotions and offers that attack consumers' consciousness from all sides and can impose on children the concept of the necessity of possessing precisely this thing, about which he never knew before and lived peacefully without it. Also envy can become a driving force in the child's desires, and he will want to have what others possess.

If children already go to kindergarten or school, then you are surprised at how much new releases on the market of another children's brand capture their consciousness, after which all the children want to have this and play with this.

Manufacturers know how advertising affects human consciousness and feelings, and very skillfully promote their goods. Therefore, parents should have special wisdom and protection in these matters.

Gifts should not become a replacement for your time, attention and communication with children. They should not be given out of guilt as payment for lack of your care or as a distracting maneuver so that you are left alone. Although children do not understand everything about your true motives, they feel when you do something insincerely.

When choosing a gift, it is important to consider the child's age. What makes him happy at 3 years old can become an insult to him at 10 years old. And the older your children are, the more wisdom is necessary to have in choosing the thing you want to give them. If you really want to please your child, then ask him what he would like to receive from you as a gift, and then discuss this together and do not hide your intentions to give him what he wants, and if you promised, then be sure to fulfill your words. Waiting for a gift already makes the child's life a holiday. He is already happy in anticipation of his dream coming true.

A gift can be not only some toy, but it can become a useful book, a joint trip, visiting unique places, friendly pastime, games, preparing special food, going to a restaurant or museum, personal letters and much more that will strengthen your relationships more and bring genuine joy.

A gift should not be payment for good behavior or a condition for future obedience. Then this is no longer a gift, but trade: you to me - I to you. Although sometimes it is pleasant to receive payment for one's labors and efforts, but in pursuit of the material, spiritual values can be lost.

It is written in Eccl. 7:7 that gifts corrupt the heart, and if you do not believe this, then someday you will be convinced of this if you do not restrain your emotions and spoil children with everything in a row, considering that this is the best expression of your love.

If you see that another toy is not your child's heart language, then give him what he will accept with joy. This can be learned by asking him about the thing he wanted to receive in order to be happy and joyful. Or ask your child how and in what he sees the manifestation of parental love. As a rule, children will sincerely tell you what makes them happy in your relationships, and what they don't like about you. And then act.

If gifts are your child's love language, then here you need to show special wisdom and caution in choosing the next surprise for his heart. Gifts need to be beautifully and originally packaged and presented with special love and joy. After all, this is not only a thing, but also your attitude. This is a memory of your love. This is much more than just a gift. The child sees your heart in this.

Gifts should not upset and overexcite. They cannot be taken away, canceled, broken or spoiled as punishment. And if this love language is not your native one, then do not judge another's feelings by yourself. Believe that each person best accepts and understands love in that language which is closer to his heart, and not to yours.

If you have many children, and for some of them gifts are the heart language, this does not mean that others also perfectly understand such expression of your love. Each child should receive what is closer to him in spirit and heart. And let everything be with love for you. 1 Cor. 16:14.

1. Please read James 1:17; Acts 20:35; Rom. 6:23; 8:32; Matt. 2:11; 7:11; Luke 6:38; Prov. 3:27; 11:25; 18:16; 21:14; 1 Cor. 13:3; 2 Cor. 8:12; 1 John 3:1, in light of this chapter.

2. What other verses from the Bible came to your mind?

3. What did you understand from this chapter?

4. What are gifts?

5. Why are gifts a special love language for some children? How to determine this?

6. How to properly choose a gift for a child for whom this is his heart language?

7. Does God like to give gifts to His children? What has He given you?

8. What influence does advertising have on children's desires to receive certain gifts?

9. Why shouldn't gifts be given out of guilt or duty?

10. Why can't gifts be used as payment for good deeds or as an advance for good behavior?

11. What is dangerous about excessive spoiling of children with gifts?

12. Why is it important to fulfill promises about gifts?

13. What spiritual values can be lost in pursuit of material gifts?

14. Why can't one judge others' perception of gifts by one's own preferences?