The Spiritual Life of a Teenager

Children who have been taught Christian values from childhood are usually more receptive to biblical truths during adolescence and express a desire to receive water baptism and become part of the church fellowship. This initiative comes from parents and church leaders, but it also happens that the child themselves desires to make a covenant with God and become a full member of God's people.

It has been observed that churches that have their own schools and other educational institutions statistically retain their children from going into the world. Also, those teenagers who have friends in the church are less inclined to seek friends from the world and leave their fellowship.

And yet the church and all kinds of church ministries are voluntary work and cannot be coercive and attract people against their will.

Small children can be very capricious in the mornings, and parents who are going to worship do not ask the child's consent, but simply take them under the arm and carry them where they need to go. But such a trick will not work with a teenager. They can be forced to go to a meeting, but this will cause rebellion and rejection of subsequent attendance at worship services, even if they had no such plans before.

I was a frequent witness to how zealous parents would catch their teenagers on the street when they went outside the church building to talk to each other about their affairs, and force the children with threats to stop empty talk and go to worship. As a rule, teenagers showed obedience due to having no other choice, but subsequently I noticed that they completely stopped coming to worship services and disappeared forever. And questions to their parents about where their children were now received the same answers: they say they chose the world and do not want to live with God.

And when there was an opportunity to talk with these teenagers, you understand that they had rejection not of God, but of that wrong image that was presented about God by their parents or church ministers.

Teenagers are very sensitive to any hypocrisy, they find it disgusting to see the duplicity of those who should be representatives of Christ, but put on this mask only when it is needed to make an impression on fellow believers. And young people see everything and everyone, especially if these meetings happen outside spiritual gatherings.

What else can cause teenagers to choose the world?

• Personal absence of living faith and personal relationship with God in their parents;

• Absence of deep knowledge and understanding of God's Word and lack of understanding of what ministries are needed for;

• Formality of worship services;

• Distrust of God or disappointment in Him due to unanswered sincere prayers;

• Absence of proper youth activities in the church, where young people are involved in various ministries and a missionary spirit is cultivated in them;

• Personal sins and sinful dependencies that are condemned in the church;

• Absence of friends among peers in the church;

• Mockery and pressure from worldly friends;

• Absence of personal rebirth, understanding of God's mercy and perception of religion as a collection of rules and prohibitions;

• Strict criticism from believers for any mistakes or unusual appearance;

• Conflicts and disagreements with parents in the father's house;

• Fear of being imperfect in a society of "holy" and strict people;

• Absence of wise people who know answers to complex teenage questions;

• Conservative view of life by standards of past generations and unwillingness of church members to keep up with the times, using modern technologies to advance the Gospel;

• Too superficial attitude to truth or too complex and confusing, with incomprehensible terminology;

• Absence of practical application of truths proclaimed from the pulpit;

• Constant "must" and "you should" without love and friendship;

• Enmity of church members with each other or division of the church into family or warring clans;

• Presence of open sin in the church without attempts to condemn it or fix something;

• Harsh discipline without love and understanding of the teenager's needs;

• Gossip, discussion of others in their absence, intrigue, tale-bearing, fanaticism;

• Absence of internal motivation and understanding of why it is needed;

• No place for new ideas, creativity and implementation of one's talents.

There are many more personal and spiritual experiences that can repel not only teenagers but also adults from God. And although the church is a kind of conditional hospital for parishioners, there should also be doctors present who feel the atmosphere and know how to help whom.

The absence of youth leaders who are interested in the spiritual growth of young people and active involvement of them in missionary work can negatively affect even believing teenagers. The enemy of souls will certainly find something to occupy inquiring minds and offer them what will distract from Christ and pull into the world.

Parents often choose a church they are used to, which is closer to home or where they grew up and know everyone. But if they see that no one is working with their youth, and somewhere there is a church where young people are involved in ministry and are very friendly, then it is worth changing the congregation for the sake of their children and showing teenagers that there are better places than where they have been going since childhood.

If a teenager has left one community to become part of another, this is normal practice, and this should be welcomed and understood that they are seeking what is close and dear to their heart. I know families who left everything and moved to live in a new place for the sake of the spiritual future of their children and were successful. But when a teenager leaves the church and God, then it is necessary to sound the alarm and not judge the young soul for such a choice, but understand the reason, which will certainly be revealed in trusting communication. If your teenager does not trust you, then find someone who knows how to communicate with young people and knows how to help them.

Remember that in addition to church matters, a teenager has many personal questions and fears that can confuse them and affect their self-esteem.

For a teenager, a society of their peers is very important, of those who are equally inexperienced and seeking, but where they will be accepted as their own. And this desire to be accepted and needed can be a priority even higher than relationships with God.

The Lord knows what young people experience, and seeks those who can correctly present God's love and the beauty of God's character to youth, so that through these people the growing generation can be accustomed to cultivating trust in God and personal relationships with the Savior.

In addition to those factors that disappoint young people in church gatherings, there are also those moments that can enchant teenagers and so attract them to God that no negativity or fanaticism of church members can push them away from following Christ.

When a person is enchanted by Jesus, has personal living relationships with Him and thirsts for greater revelations, then no one and nothing can shake their faith.

And if you consider that almost all of Jesus's disciples were young people, then you understand what interest God has in this category of humanity and what prospects the Lord has for the rising generation.

1. Please read Prov. 22:6; Matt. 19:14; Heb. 10:24-25; 1 Sam. 2:12, 17, 22-25; Prov. 13:20; James 1:22; 1 John 3:18; Jer. 1:7; Ps. 118(119):9; Eccl. 12:1, in light of this lesson.

2. What other verses from the Bible came to your mind?

3. What was revealed to you in this chapter?

4. Why does coercion in spiritual matters often give the opposite result?

5. What role do you think church school plays in keeping youth in faith?

6. Why is friendship among believing peers so important for teenagers?

7. What makes worship formal, and how can this be avoided?

8. Why are teenagers especially sensitive to adult hypocrisy?

9. What other reasons for teenagers leaving the church do you know?

10. How can the church compete with worldly entertainment for youth attention?

11. What questions should parents ask themselves if their teenager is leaving the church?

12. How to help a teenager transition from "parental faith" to their own?

13. What does it mean to be "enchanted by Jesus"?

14. What prospects does God see for the young generation, and how should this influence our attitude toward youth?

15. What are you personally ready to change in your attitude toward teenagers after studying this lesson?