The Time Has Come to Love

In the life of every child, there comes a time when hormonal changes laid down by God are activated in their body, which leads to intensive physical growth and noticeable changes in thinking. This time is commonly called the "adolescent period," through which all people pass, but not all of them remember and understand what their parents experienced. But when these former teenagers become parents and live to see the moment when a teenager appears in their family, they sometimes become lost in guessing what is happening with their child, who suddenly transformed into a marvel and is confidently moving in the direction of a monster.

The most popular topic in child rearing is the "adolescent period," which is also the most complex for many parents and the most incomprehensible in practical terms.

I think that the periods of growth and relationships with children can be boldly divided into several stages: from birth to five years you serve the children; from five to ten years they serve you; from ten to fifteen years the time has come to love; from fifteen to twenty the time of friendship has arrived. Although all these qualities of relationships are not tied to time and blend with one another, regardless of the children's age, this is exactly how I named the conscious approach of parents to raising children for God in each period of the child's growth. I think that many problems in relationships arise precisely among those parents who do not understand the peculiarities of each age and do not want to change in their attitude what they consider correct and unquestionable.

Everything that parents managed and were able to invest in the child's heart in the first years of the child's life, everything they taught him, everything that was sown, will bear its fruit in all subsequent years. All those mistakes, ignorance in upbringing and lack of time for children will also make themselves known and manifest themselves accordingly during the transition from childhood to youth.

That influence of good and evil under which your children were in your home managed to form their characters and worldview. If you had no time to tell children about God, then in all subsequent years you will have to tell God about your children and ask for a miracle for them.

God is unique in that He can always, at any stage of growth, in any situation, under any circumstances, correct everything that is beyond human power. He gives every person who decides to establish a relationship with Him a new heart and new thoughts and make of him what will be accepted by Heaven into the Eternal dwellings.

But it would be foolish to hope for God or a miracle of conversion in the future without showing proper attention to children in the present. By allowing the enemy of souls to engage in raising my children through all kinds of sources of information and people not consecrated to God, I risk that their love for the world will overshadow any knowledge of God and their vain way of thinking will overshadow the influence of the Holy Spirit when He draws them to Jesus.

Over the course of 30 years, observing the relationships of children and parents in the church and seeing how many children in adolescence leave for the world forever and never come to God again, one wants to understand why this happens and what is the cause of such apostasy? I do not think that only the children are to blame for this, having free choice, but I am also not going to blame the parents, because even with the best influence, there are unforeseen circumstances from outside that helped the children make the wrong choice.

The family and the accepted relationships of its members to each other lay the main foundation in the character and worldview of the child. But good upbringing without personal relationships with God does not guarantee a righteous life for a young person. He can become a cultured sinner, without harmful habits, with an impeccable reputation and good character. But it is precisely Christ in the heart that is the restraining Force preventing spiritual fall and the choice of other values.

Sin has the power to exert mighty influence on the will and mind of man and there is only one force capable of destroying these binding chains - this is God's grace given by faith in Jesus.

The family is a kind of relay race in which it is necessary not only to run the assigned distance but also to pass the relay baton of faith in Jesus, without which the entire race is considered invalid. Of course, God does not think by worldly criteria and He has a plan for any situation and He can hand the lost baton to the runners just before the finish line, but this should not plunge us into carelessness, thinking that the Lord should somehow save our children by Himself. Without us and our prayers, it is difficult to imagine how and what will happen with our children. God acts through man to save man.

If you do not yet have children or they are still very small, then you have a good chance for a good beginning and avoiding many problems. Raising children for God is a struggle, it is a battle with oneself, it is a war in which there are no weekends and vacations, it is cooperation with Higher spiritual Forces to achieve constant victories, it is a lifelong school for oneself and those whom Heaven has entrusted to you. But victory comes from the Lord. Jesus has already won in this war and only with Him will we also be victors.

We cannot manage to do everything, we will not succeed in passing everything to our children, not all important truths will be revealed to us to the end, but God is able to correct all our shortcomings, misses and mistakes when we go with Him to victory in our life.

We have no right to determine the choice of our children and decide their fate for them, but we can exert influence and support, we can pray for them and we can love them at all times.

The time has come to love your children, to love without any conditions, to love at all times, to love even when it seems impossible, to love despite everything. And to love not blindly, but combining mercy and justice, strictness and indulgence, faith and love.

If I have something to pass on to my children, then the choice always remains with them whether to take what I give them and whether to carry it further. My responsibility is then passed on and placed upon those who were entrusted to me, but I do not cease to be a parent, and the commandment to honor father and mother, given to my offspring, does not lose its power.

For those parents who understand that they missed something, gave too little of something, showed negligence or ignorance in something, there is good news that at the end of time a special message will sound and special influence will be poured out on families. We read Mal 4:5-6: "Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the LORD. And he will turn the hearts of the fathers to the children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers, lest I come and strike the earth with a curse." We believe that everything we do studying family issues and upbringing issues is also a partial fulfillment of this promise and the Lord will certainly fulfill through us what He promised in His word.

The current of this world is very strong and it captures and carries away all who do not resist it. And may your oars never be dry. We read "...Listen to me, you men of Judah and you people of Jerusalem! Have faith in the LORD your God and you will be upheld; have faith in his prophets and you will be successful." 2Chr 20:20.

1. Please read John 3:16; Prov 22:6; 29:17; Eph 6:4; Deut 6:6-7; Isa 1:16-18; 54:13; Rom 12:2; Job 1:5; Luke 15:20; Jer 29:11; 2Tim 1:5 in light of this lesson.

2. What other verses from the Bible came to your mind?

3. What was revealed to you in this chapter?

4. How can parents prepare for the adolescent period of their children?

5. Why is it important to change the approach to upbringing depending on the child's age?

6. How does the atmosphere in the family influence the child's worldview?

7. Why should we not hope only for a miracle of conversion in the future?

8. What does the relay baton symbolize in child rearing? And why is its transmission so important?

9. Why should we not be careless, hoping for God's help and participation without making any effort in child rearing from our side?

10. Why is upbringing cooperation with Higher spiritual forces?

11. Why does God promise to turn the hearts of fathers to children and the hearts of children to their fathers?

12. What do oars symbolize in the spiritual life of the family?

13. Why is it important to combine mercy and justice in love for children?

14. What hope remains for parents who made mistakes in upbringing?